Stimulus Plan for Printers --DeWese

Wait, maybe there’s some confusion about the name of our industry. Lots of folks no longer want to call it the printing industry. Perhaps the White House and Congress didn’t know what to call us. I’ll look under “printing industry” in the stimulus package.

Nope. No money there for our industry of about 30,000 firms and 1 million workers. 

Still others call us the print communications industry. I’ll check again. Nope. Nada. Nothing here. Can’t find any money for “print communications” companies. 

I guess Congress was confused about what to call us, so they just left us out of the big Stimulus Package. We should remember this when they start calling us to print their brochures, direct mail, yard signs and banners.

Meanwhile, I am getting phone calls from companies indicating they’re closing their doors, declaring bankruptcy or that want to merge with other firms—anybody who’s got some money. Still others are calling to say, “We had a terrible fourth quarter and, so far, 2009 is even worse.”

All of this got me thinking. The automakers got a lot of government help. The bankers received even more money. Can you imagine the size of those Electronic Funds Transfers? The government now either owns a big share and/or is owed billions by General Motors, AIG and the big banks.

(My wife, Attila the Nun, just walked by and remarked that I look like I’m thinking. She warned me of the dangers that can occur when that happens.) 

Well, dammit, our plants are closing! 

Paper isn’t being delivered! 

Good people are being laid off!

Offshore buyers don’t want our used equipment!

I’ve got to do something about this. You will continue to slide downhill unless you change your way of living. 

So, I’m gonna do something drastic and create my own Stimulus Package. I’m introducing the Mañana Man Economic Stimulus Plan for Printing Companies. The acronym is easily pronounced MMESPPC.

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