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Besides, I have just completed the negotiation of my new 20-year contract with Attila the Editor. It did not go well. The contract requires that I write at least three serious columns each year. This means the other columns can be entertaining and riotously funny.
That's not so bad. The bad parts of the contract involve washing his car, shining his shoes and sharpening his pencils. I know that if I could win a Pulitzer Prize that I could hook on with Esquire, Time or Playboy and escape Attila's sweat shop. Well, anyway, this will be one of my serious columns for the year.
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