A Dose of Printing Reality --DeWese
A Look Into Harris' Day
All I have are these columns and some speeches I have to make. Believe it or not, it only takes about two hours to write the columns and I make up the speeches in the cab from the airport. Then it's work, work, work.
I have to do this Compass Capital Partners mergers and acquisitions report and I'm busy working on and negotiating about 15 printing company deals. Plus I'm on this stupid diet and have to spend about three minutes a day eating. Another hour is spent sculpting my body with Tommie the Trainer.
I was sitting by my garden shed when I had an idea. My bid for the presidency running on the Lithography Party platform went nowhere, so I decided to secede my gardens from the United States. The new nation will run from my pool fence back to Big Al Tegler's property line. I'm calling it The Republic of MañanaManVille. I've even created a flag for my new country. It's a dollar sign on a field of gold.
I'm busy now writing a constitution. It will enable all printing companies to domicile (register) in The Republic of MañanaManVille. And get this: NO TAXES! Even better, they must add 50 percent markups to all their jobs and their customers have to actually pay it!
Print salespeople can become citizens of The Republic of MañanaManVille. They don't have to live here. But their citizenship means that print buyers must take their calls and see them whenever a salesperson feels like making a personal call.
Or, better yet, I will require print buyers to come to the plant to see the print salespeople by appointment only! And when the print buyers call for an appointment, they have to tell you why they are qualified to buy printing from you. Gosh, I'm on a roll now.