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Company Behind Prestigious Printing Awards Blames ‘Prestigiousness’ for Missing Pharaoh

January 18, 2013 By Kingston Tuttleman
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PHILADELPHIA—Jan. 18, 2013—Police finished questioning the last of a few dozen distraught employees on the 1500 block of Spring Garden St. early this morning about a missing Pharaoh statue whose likeness was the face of the printing industry’s highly coveted Gold Ink Awards.

 “It’s distracting, not having The Pharaoh here. There’s a big, empty space where the statue used to sit and I keep looking at it. I just don’t understand how someone could do this,” said an obviously shaken Alexander Schwartz, Gold Ink’s Marketing Manager.The Pharaoh went missing after Gold Ink’s former marketing chief, Maggie May, left the company “to travel.” As we spoke with more Gold Ink team members, we learned that May was often recognized for her off-beat and often wild marketing tactics.“I don’t blame her, not that I’m accusing her, but everything seems to line up. The timing, the whacky note with just two words—The Prestige, properly italicized to denote a major work. It all just screams Maggie,” Schwartz admitted.But not everyone at 1500 Spring Garden is so convinced of May’s guilt. We spoke with NAPCO’s VP of Marketing, Patty Perkins, about her thoughts on this seemingly random act of mischief.

“I knew Maggie. She might have been a little ‘misunderstood,’ but she certainly wasn’t a thief. She donated the Pharaoh to us in the first place. I don’t think she would have taken it back without saying anything,” maintained Perkins.The oddest part of this ordeal has been how little it has bothered Gold Ink’s Publisher, Mark Subers.“We know that the Gold Inks are the most highly coveted awards in the industry. That’s clear. Since the application process had previously been so difficult, it just stands to reason that someone would simply cut to the chase and come take the very symbol of the awards itself—The Pharaoh! I’m not surprised, and I don’t blame Maggie. I blame the prestigiousness of the awards,” remarked Subers.Until now, the Gold Ink entry forms had been wonky and applicants had to provide a lot of information to even be considered for an award. And, according to Subers, there was good reason for a printer to want to find a shortcut. The Gold Inks are widely considered to be among the most influential awards in the industry.

“If you’ve won Gold and attended the awards gala, you can understand why someone would be willing to go to such lengths to attain that prestige again,” he said.“But honestly, I couldn’t really care less who stole The Pharaoh. We got the hint—that’s the most important takeaway. We’ve completely relaunched and re-imagined the Gold Ink Awards, starting with a NEW Pharaohless logo. We’re sending past entrants Gold Ink Tags that make it easier to submit entries, streamlining the process and really getting down to the important part—recognizing great printing,” concluded Subers.Cash in on some of the prestige you’ve earned and use your Gold Ink Tag to enter the 2013 Gold Ink Awards. Visit goldink.com!      

*This article is for entertainment purposes only. 


 
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